Filling an Empty Place

Today is my last day in Bloomington for awhile. I'm just finishing up some last-minute tasks before heading off to India again. Although I am excited to return, this time I am acutely aware of the people and places I'm leaving behind, even if only temporary. There is a good amount of sadness mixed with the excitement. I am the happiest I've been in a long time, but more conscious of the consequences of time and choice. I will miss dearly my family and friends, old and new. Although this will certainly be an adventure, it will be one that has been planned for me, and it will involve a great deal of work and learning.

Here's a poem I published a couple of years after my last trip to India:

And Such Is the Paradox of Living

I'm winding up my first year in law school; only three more weeks of class before finals. It has been a stressful but productive year. I've struggled to find time for everything, but that's par for the course, supposedly. I've barely done anything with my music — nothing new has been written, but I've managed to do a bit of mixing and mastering. My language study has fallen behind; I was keeping up with Mandarin and French in the fall (didn't find time for Spanish). Now I'm back to Hindi/Urdu, because I'll be returning to India this summer. I will be working in a legal internship in Hyderabad (although Telugu is the official state language, Urdu is most common in the capital of Andhra Pradesh), for the Council for Social Development, advocating for women, children, and disadvantaged social groups.

I don't get to do much reading outside of class material, but I'm currently working on Marcel Proust's In Search of Lost Time. I'm still on Swann's Way, but it is by far the most amazing novel I've ever read. The last french novel I read was Stendhal's The Charterhouse of Parma — fast-paced and a bit thrilling, whereas reading Proust is exactly like the first paragraph of Swann's Way:

The problems that you suffer from are problems that you make.

Here, check this link out. It's Yale's open online courses. They have a plethora of subjects available; each course has transcripts, audio, and video for an entire semester, with reading assignments and downloaded material. Pretty sweet, although I can't vouch for any of the material. I'm checking out the only philosophy class, which is a freshman-level introductory course on death, and it seems decent. Although, it makes me wonder how obsessed Yale professors are about their image. Maybe it's just that guy.

It's been awhile since I've said much of anything here, and I intend to write more since I'm leaving home for a long while, so I'll catch you up.

Mother Russia Rain Down

I'm about to head off to St. Petersburg; I'll try to update this while I'm there. In the meantime, I'll let you all know what I've been up to. I've been seriously considering law school, and I'm taking the LSAT in October. My practice test scores have been in the 165-176 range, so I'm confident that I'll do well and may even get into a decent school. I'm leaning toward international and environmental law. I've been learning Mandarin Chinese, which will be my fifth language, although I don't know if I can still count Hindi since I'm very rusty at this point. I still have the basics swimming around in there; it just needs a little practice. I've been taking acting classes for fun, and played in Animal Farm. I've also been writing again, and started what may turn into a longer work, perhaps even a novel someday. I haven't been hanging out or talking with very many friends, which I'm not thrilled about, but I blame that on my withdrawal since coming back from India. I've gone to some concerts recently with my youngest brother and my girlfriend: Covenant, which was decent, and Project Pitchfork, which was awesome. Before that I saw Baby Venom a couple of times before they broke up. I've been trying to get into photography, but have not had much time. I've.... also been reading some.... analytic philosophy.... *shudder*....